Wow, 2 months since my last post. Time sure does fly.
In the last week, one recently graduated post-doc cracked mentally, one postdoc decided the guilt over leaving her son in daycare (he gets sick a lot) wasn’t worth it, and a doctoral student lost his sh!t and exploded at his mentor, thereby getting himself royally kicked out of the program. In the first instance, I can see it. She’s had a rough year and, once the adrenaline of getting through the defense wore off, her life caught up with her. In the second instance I cannot imagine what makes someone decide to spend 10 years of their life preparing for a career, then decide it’s “all or nothing”. There are other options after all: part-time care, working from home, or doing “swing-shift” work schedules with your husband. And in the last instance, well I wouldn’t have guessed it. He seemed pretty stable, but then again maybe he was in the right.
I dunno. Maybe it’s something in the air. But I, for one, would love to see a survey about the number of people that start graduate school drug- and therapy-free as compared to those who graduate. At least ½ of the graduate students I know are taking some form of pill – anti-anxiety, anti-depressant, or just sleeping medication. I know I’ve had a hard time keeping myself from hiding under the desk lately.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Would you be my zombie Valentine?
Have you seen the most recent Milla Jovovitch zombie-killer movie- Resident Evil: Apocalypse (2004)? It’s pretty good if you like that sort of thing.
Which I do of course.
I would watch it again and again, but with much popcorn and soda. Oh, and rapid access to the pause button on the remote to facilitate running commentary with my long-suffering husband. He only endures my love of trash horror/sci-fi movies only because he loves me more than coffee…usually…mostly.
(remember Evil Dead? Mars Attacks? Red Comet?!? I love those!!!)
Anyway – they introduce a character in that movie that I swore they were calling him Lord Jefferson (LJ for short). It immediately has become my favorite name for our as-of-yet unconceived first-born child. Can't you just imagine yelling that down the street when the little heathen doesn’t want to come home from his friend’s house?
“Lord Jefferson L***, get your butt home right this instant!’
“Good morning Lord Jefferson”
“Hello Lord”
We could even send him to boarding school in England, where he would immediately baffle the other children – Is he just a Deity? Or is he actually Titled? (I hear their priorities are a little whacked sometimes) So confusing!
Going straight to He11 – do not Pass Go, etc, etc.
My husband was somewhat amused, but I can tell the name idea wasn’t put on his “Serious Consideration For Naming A Child” list.
Then again, he likes the name Benedict. (which may indeed be a fine name for all of you Benedict-lovers out there, but it is not on MY SCFNAC list. I’m just saying that we don’t see eye to eye on the naming issue).
(Later IMDB’ing and Googling showed that the character’s actual name was Lloyd Jefferson). Somehow, it’s not quite as good that way….
Oooooh, I just noticed there’s a new Resident Evil coming out this year. Fun for the whole family!
And on a final note - it snowed this morning. Just a little, but here in the South, it counts!
Here's proof (and yes, that's snow, not salt or sand, so don't be a disbeliever.)
So Happy Valentine's Day.
Which I do of course.
I would watch it again and again, but with much popcorn and soda. Oh, and rapid access to the pause button on the remote to facilitate running commentary with my long-suffering husband. He only endures my love of trash horror/sci-fi movies only because he loves me more than coffee…usually…mostly.
(remember Evil Dead? Mars Attacks? Red Comet?!? I love those!!!)
Anyway – they introduce a character in that movie that I swore they were calling him Lord Jefferson (LJ for short). It immediately has become my favorite name for our as-of-yet unconceived first-born child. Can't you just imagine yelling that down the street when the little heathen doesn’t want to come home from his friend’s house?
“Lord Jefferson L***, get your butt home right this instant!’
“Good morning Lord Jefferson”
“Hello Lord”
We could even send him to boarding school in England, where he would immediately baffle the other children – Is he just a Deity? Or is he actually Titled? (I hear their priorities are a little whacked sometimes) So confusing!
Going straight to He11 – do not Pass Go, etc, etc.
My husband was somewhat amused, but I can tell the name idea wasn’t put on his “Serious Consideration For Naming A Child” list.
Then again, he likes the name Benedict. (which may indeed be a fine name for all of you Benedict-lovers out there, but it is not on MY SCFNAC list. I’m just saying that we don’t see eye to eye on the naming issue).
(Later IMDB’ing and Googling showed that the character’s actual name was Lloyd Jefferson). Somehow, it’s not quite as good that way….
Oooooh, I just noticed there’s a new Resident Evil coming out this year. Fun for the whole family!
And on a final note - it snowed this morning. Just a little, but here in the South, it counts!
Here's proof (and yes, that's snow, not salt or sand, so don't be a disbeliever.)
So Happy Valentine's Day.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Defending Your Life
One of my best friends is about to defend her dissertation. It’s for a PhD in Literature and, although mine was in a science, I can see that the process/hazing/trauma looks to be pretty much the same. So she calls me to ask for advice, tips, and insider tricks....and I don’t want to talk about it. My defense was almost a year ago (it was successful, thanks) and I am loathe to even think about it still. It’s sort of like PTSD- remembering the actual event brings an adrenaline rush and anxiety as if I were actually still there. As if no time has passed and “They” can still pronounce me unworthy with a resounding “NO”! It’s not called a “defense” for nothing. It would be more appropriate to be allowed to curl up into a ball to protect your vital organs, rather than have to stand up behind a podium and try to think clearly.
Good things happened that day too. It was a full house, all of my colleagues and fellow students were there. My husband sat proudly in the audience. The lights were in my eyes and the rest of the room was dark, so I couldn’t really see him. But I knew he was there and every time I tripped over a thought or phrase, (or said “um” again! I really need to quit doing that) I looked to where he was sitting. He was my mental and emotional touchstone. A really big rabbit's foot, if you will.
And boy howdy did we throw a party at graduation! All of the pictures verify that I was plastered (eyes half-closed, sh!t-eating grin on my face). Yep, it was done, the horrible experience was survived, now back to having a life with All-New Extra FUN!™ and HAPPINESS! ™
I wish her luck. She won’t need it, but it never hurts to have luck on your side. I’ve given her the only tips I know – get plenty of sleep, no distractions, stay in the mental zone, and bring snacks for the Committee. Bribery doesn’t hurt. She should be fine. She’s made it this far and, as they say, she is truly the most knowledgeable person on the topic she is about to defend.
But I neither miss, nor envy, what she has in front of her.
Good things happened that day too. It was a full house, all of my colleagues and fellow students were there. My husband sat proudly in the audience. The lights were in my eyes and the rest of the room was dark, so I couldn’t really see him. But I knew he was there and every time I tripped over a thought or phrase, (or said “um” again! I really need to quit doing that) I looked to where he was sitting. He was my mental and emotional touchstone. A really big rabbit's foot, if you will.
And boy howdy did we throw a party at graduation! All of the pictures verify that I was plastered (eyes half-closed, sh!t-eating grin on my face). Yep, it was done, the horrible experience was survived, now back to having a life with All-New Extra FUN!™ and HAPPINESS! ™
I wish her luck. She won’t need it, but it never hurts to have luck on your side. I’ve given her the only tips I know – get plenty of sleep, no distractions, stay in the mental zone, and bring snacks for the Committee. Bribery doesn’t hurt. She should be fine. She’s made it this far and, as they say, she is truly the most knowledgeable person on the topic she is about to defend.
But I neither miss, nor envy, what she has in front of her.
Wednesday, February 7, 2007
Road trip!
Ohhh, we're going on a roadtrip and I can't WAIT! Our MINI (meet Jezebel) 
needs her regular service and we don't have a dealer in this state. So we are using this as an excuse to go to Nashville. Wheeee!!!!! The last time we went out of town, when we weren't going to visit someone else, was for our honeymoon!
I have done my homework. We are staying at a nice hotel that is NOT a chain. Dinner might be room service or a fancy-schmancy dinner in the hotel restaurant. The next day we will be having breakfast at the Loveless, or the Tin Angel, or even Monell's (depending on what time we wake up). We do have to take the dog, so I specifically researched nice, outdoorsy things to do. There is a 2-mile walk that goes past a lot of "historic Nashville" types of things that looks nice if the weather holds.
La la la la....Gosh, Wednesday is so far from Friday. Why isn't it Friday yet?!?
needs her regular service and we don't have a dealer in this state. So we are using this as an excuse to go to Nashville. Wheeee!!!!! The last time we went out of town, when we weren't going to visit someone else, was for our honeymoon!
I have done my homework. We are staying at a nice hotel that is NOT a chain. Dinner might be room service or a fancy-schmancy dinner in the hotel restaurant. The next day we will be having breakfast at the Loveless, or the Tin Angel, or even Monell's (depending on what time we wake up). We do have to take the dog, so I specifically researched nice, outdoorsy things to do. There is a 2-mile walk that goes past a lot of "historic Nashville" types of things that looks nice if the weather holds.
La la la la....Gosh, Wednesday is so far from Friday. Why isn't it Friday yet?!?
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Performance-enhancing drugs
No, I am not talking about steroids or Vi@gra. I am talking about Rit@lin (i.e. methylphenid@te). During my early graduate school days (many years ago) I took several of my classes in the Medical School with the first and second year students. I learned then that many of them were taking Rit@lin to aid in concentrating for long periods of time.
Truly, I could see the allure. The amounts of information they were required to memorize was massive. Study sessions occurred every evening and lasted 4-5 hours (on top of the full day of attending classes). I counted myself lucky that I was only taking a few of the classes that they had to take.
But the question that was, and still is, being raised was “Is it ethical to take a non-medically necessary, performance-enhancing drug to perform better in school?” Proponents argued that:
1) it helped them to learn the material better and therefore would become better doctors, and
2) the side effects were minimal and unlikely to hurt them over the long term. Opponents countered with:
1) it was illegal to take unprescribed medicine, especially for an off-label use,
2) there was a “risk of developing dependence” and therefore, when they stopped taking it after medical school, they ran the risk of actually becoming “worse” doctors, and
3) taking drugs to increase study power meant that the drug-takers would make better grades, thereby driving up the grade curve for the rest of the class.
Personally, I think that the opponents viewed the skewed grade-curve effect as the most important, simply because it was the most harmful to themselves.
I didn’t take sides. But, from a purely scientific point of view, it would be interesting to see how many of the top 5% (vs. the bottom 5%) of any graduating medical class tested positive for this “performance-enhancing drug”.
And I wonder how many of those people are still having to take it during their medical practice?
Why am I thinking about this so many years later? Because I seem to have the attention span of an ADD’ed 6 year-old today. Popping a pill to gain some focus doesn’t sound so criminal right now. But don’t worry, I won’t go toodling over to the Med School across the street to try and score some Rit@lin. I have no cash and I don’t think they take credit cards.
Truly, I could see the allure. The amounts of information they were required to memorize was massive. Study sessions occurred every evening and lasted 4-5 hours (on top of the full day of attending classes). I counted myself lucky that I was only taking a few of the classes that they had to take.
But the question that was, and still is, being raised was “Is it ethical to take a non-medically necessary, performance-enhancing drug to perform better in school?” Proponents argued that:
1) it helped them to learn the material better and therefore would become better doctors, and
2) the side effects were minimal and unlikely to hurt them over the long term. Opponents countered with:
1) it was illegal to take unprescribed medicine, especially for an off-label use,
2) there was a “risk of developing dependence” and therefore, when they stopped taking it after medical school, they ran the risk of actually becoming “worse” doctors, and
3) taking drugs to increase study power meant that the drug-takers would make better grades, thereby driving up the grade curve for the rest of the class.
Personally, I think that the opponents viewed the skewed grade-curve effect as the most important, simply because it was the most harmful to themselves.
I didn’t take sides. But, from a purely scientific point of view, it would be interesting to see how many of the top 5% (vs. the bottom 5%) of any graduating medical class tested positive for this “performance-enhancing drug”.
And I wonder how many of those people are still having to take it during their medical practice?
Why am I thinking about this so many years later? Because I seem to have the attention span of an ADD’ed 6 year-old today. Popping a pill to gain some focus doesn’t sound so criminal right now. But don’t worry, I won’t go toodling over to the Med School across the street to try and score some Rit@lin. I have no cash and I don’t think they take credit cards.
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
How NOT to receive a gift
Generally, I tend to crave the more savory foods over sweets. Give me cracked black pepper Triscuits with cream cheese and habanero marmalade (my current obsession) over cheesecake or cookies any day. But there are a few exceptions - quality dark chocolate, carrot cake with cream cheese frosting, and peanut butter fudge.
Every year my mother exchanges sweets trays with the neighbor across the street, and the tray she (we!) receive has always had peanut butter fudge.
I look forward to it.
I crave it.
It is different from any other I've ever purchased, much more intensely-peanut-buttery than others I've tried. And this year there was none on the tray....and I was devastated. So much so that my dear, sweet mother snuck a jar of peanut butter into my husband's bag with instructions that he* should surprise me with peanut butter fudge when we got home.
He didn't have THE recipe, but looked online to the trusted Allrecipes.com for a popular one. For whatever the reason, it didn't work. Bless the man, he tried to salvage it by improvising, but the results were crumbly, too sweet, not very peanutty, and just not right.
And, in my disappointment, I did something I am not proud of. In front of a man who'd slaved to make something for me that he'd never made before - I cried "no, No, NO!!!!!" It would have only been more childish if I'd stomped my feet with each "no".
I hurt his feelings and all of my apologies were too late.
The next time we were visiting my parents, my mother went and got the recipe from her neighbor.
Upon investigating, we discovered that The Original Recipe does not have any milk or cream of any kind. Whereas the majority of recipes do call for evaporated milk or cream of some sort.
We now have the recipe stuck to the refrigerator. I suspect I am going to be the one to make it, because I can't bear the thought of him going through all of that work and, on a long shot, it not turning out for a second time. But, even if it NEVER turns out properly, I have learned my lesson. In these types of instances, it really is the thought that counts.
Maybe I'll make him something he likes while I'm at it.
*it should be noted that he is a far better cook than I am, so my mother's trust in his skills are never misguided.
Every year my mother exchanges sweets trays with the neighbor across the street, and the tray she (we!) receive has always had peanut butter fudge.
I look forward to it.
I crave it.
It is different from any other I've ever purchased, much more intensely-peanut-buttery than others I've tried. And this year there was none on the tray....and I was devastated. So much so that my dear, sweet mother snuck a jar of peanut butter into my husband's bag with instructions that he* should surprise me with peanut butter fudge when we got home.
He didn't have THE recipe, but looked online to the trusted Allrecipes.com for a popular one. For whatever the reason, it didn't work. Bless the man, he tried to salvage it by improvising, but the results were crumbly, too sweet, not very peanutty, and just not right.
And, in my disappointment, I did something I am not proud of. In front of a man who'd slaved to make something for me that he'd never made before - I cried "no, No, NO!!!!!" It would have only been more childish if I'd stomped my feet with each "no".
I hurt his feelings and all of my apologies were too late.
The next time we were visiting my parents, my mother went and got the recipe from her neighbor.
Upon investigating, we discovered that The Original Recipe does not have any milk or cream of any kind. Whereas the majority of recipes do call for evaporated milk or cream of some sort.
We now have the recipe stuck to the refrigerator. I suspect I am going to be the one to make it, because I can't bear the thought of him going through all of that work and, on a long shot, it not turning out for a second time. But, even if it NEVER turns out properly, I have learned my lesson. In these types of instances, it really is the thought that counts.
Maybe I'll make him something he likes while I'm at it.
*it should be noted that he is a far better cook than I am, so my mother's trust in his skills are never misguided.
Monday, January 22, 2007
Big day.
Huge in terms of women's rights.
January 22, 2007 is the 34th anniversary of Roe vs. Wade. Ladies, if ever there was a reason to vote, even when you don't think it will make a difference, this is the one. I had a long, heartfelt political argument planned, but someone else beat me to it, and she has a better voice.
Take a look: PunditMom: Keep your hands off my penumbra
My hats off to you PunditMom.
So, be informed and get out and vote! (in November, that is....)
Huge in terms of women's rights.
January 22, 2007 is the 34th anniversary of Roe vs. Wade. Ladies, if ever there was a reason to vote, even when you don't think it will make a difference, this is the one. I had a long, heartfelt political argument planned, but someone else beat me to it, and she has a better voice.
Take a look: PunditMom: Keep your hands off my penumbra
My hats off to you PunditMom.
So, be informed and get out and vote! (in November, that is....)
Thursday, January 18, 2007
When all else fails, write a blog entry
Apparently I am constantly revising in the real world, but in the blog? Not so much.
Truly, I am actually writing like a maniac. I work in research and, as such, I am expected to publish papers in academic journals. “Publish or Perish” is the actual saying. The general routine is, you spend 1-2 years doing a research study. It takes a few months to write up the results (yes, some people are faster, shut up.) then you submit said manuscript to a journal. Here’s the first tricky part - you ALWAYS submit to the Journal of Big Impressive Research (JBIR) first. Why? Well, because you are naïve and think your paper will change the world, if only there’s a large enough readership. Or because everyone says it is stellar. Or even because you are hoping that JBIR has a dearth of submissions that month and they might be feeling kind. Heh.
Whatever. 3 months (minimum) later, you get a scathing e-mail generally saying “what a cr@p-as$ study and how dare you waste our time”. If you are lucky, they include details about which parts of your manuscript are the worst.
Move down the list of impressive journals, and repeat. Eventually, your little manuscript finds a home and all of the co-authors agree that they should have tried that journal first.
Hey Internet, hold on a moment while I roll my eyes.
It can take a year or more to get a paper published. But by then you are expected to have moved on in your research to bigger and better things. The result is that you have several papers in various stages of the revision/submission process lurking around like a fetid odor. I call them albatrosses. They hang around your neck, never truly completed, and weigh you down.
So yes, I’ve been busy revising. But no, it hasn’t been in this blog.
Sorry y’all.
Truly, I am actually writing like a maniac. I work in research and, as such, I am expected to publish papers in academic journals. “Publish or Perish” is the actual saying. The general routine is, you spend 1-2 years doing a research study. It takes a few months to write up the results (yes, some people are faster, shut up.) then you submit said manuscript to a journal. Here’s the first tricky part - you ALWAYS submit to the Journal of Big Impressive Research (JBIR) first. Why? Well, because you are naïve and think your paper will change the world, if only there’s a large enough readership. Or because everyone says it is stellar. Or even because you are hoping that JBIR has a dearth of submissions that month and they might be feeling kind. Heh.
Whatever. 3 months (minimum) later, you get a scathing e-mail generally saying “what a cr@p-as$ study and how dare you waste our time”. If you are lucky, they include details about which parts of your manuscript are the worst.
Move down the list of impressive journals, and repeat. Eventually, your little manuscript finds a home and all of the co-authors agree that they should have tried that journal first.
Hey Internet, hold on a moment while I roll my eyes.
It can take a year or more to get a paper published. But by then you are expected to have moved on in your research to bigger and better things. The result is that you have several papers in various stages of the revision/submission process lurking around like a fetid odor. I call them albatrosses. They hang around your neck, never truly completed, and weigh you down.
So yes, I’ve been busy revising. But no, it hasn’t been in this blog.
Sorry y’all.
Thursday, January 4, 2007
Happy New Year!
A few days late, but the sentiment is still there.
Every year on December 31st I insist that this is going to be the BEST YEAR EVER! *booming announcer-type voice*
Then, invariably, something bad happens and I wonder if I've jinxed it.
This year was no different. The bad didn't happen to me, but to someone I love. And I am left to wondering if anything great enough can happen in the upcoming year to put a dent in the cosmic balance of bad vs. good....
Which leads me to wondering what 2007 has in store.
New for this year: a blog. So where I want to go with this blog?
Every year on December 31st I insist that this is going to be the BEST YEAR EVER! *booming announcer-type voice*
Then, invariably, something bad happens and I wonder if I've jinxed it.
This year was no different. The bad didn't happen to me, but to someone I love. And I am left to wondering if anything great enough can happen in the upcoming year to put a dent in the cosmic balance of bad vs. good....
Which leads me to wondering what 2007 has in store.
New for this year: a blog. So where I want to go with this blog?
Constantly revising.
That applies to my life, my job (whew- especially that!), and my relationships, so be prepared for a bumpy ride. What I do know about this blog is:- This will be a forum for my rants, opinions, and musings. I will try not to cross that line into airing my personal business while still staying personal, but that's an awfully gray area.
- Comments may, or may not, be enabled. Or they may be selectively enabled. (notice that I have already abandoned the "know" part of the mission statement) But I worry that I will become concerned with whether I "have comments" or not. That's too much pressure.
- I will try to update on a regular basis, but I retain the right to be random about the topics. Whatever is important in my life is what going up here. Be it food, politics, music, or origami....the only continuity is that it passed through my head at some point.
That's it. New Year, new blog. Let's see how it goes.
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